Hi, I'm Desirae
I like coffee (don’t make me drink it without cream and some kind of sweetner), neutrals, hand lettering, my overbearing goldendoodle, laughing with my husband, and being a mom to the sweetest little Gem. No really, her name is Gemma.
Wife and momma are my favorite roles by far. And, like they say, when I became a mom, everything changed.
This is the space where I talk about finding joy in motherhood, minimalism with a baby, and the fun, hand lettered stuff I make.
Motherhood is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but it’s my goal to find joy in it, because it’s also the best thing I’ve ever done.
I’ve only been a mom for 7 months. And for the first few months after the initial “maternity leave,” I tried to carry on with business as usual. I worked, and sometimes worked from home, and tried to work while pay attention with my baby, and tried to keep the house in order.
For the most part, everything was “working,” but the house was falling behind, fast. Not that it was ever all together.
Let me make this clear- I have never loved cleaning. I grew up living with excess and clutter and I’ve never been a neat freak. I’ve also never been the most organized person. So what little I kept on top of before baby was slipping from me after baby.
Luckily, my husband is great at helping with housework, but it didn’t matter. From week to week, the house would end up cluttered and we’d get way behind on cleaning.
I was starting to just accept that this is how you live with kids- cluttered. I was kind of okay with it- or at least I thought I was.
But in reality, because I was surrounded by clutter, my brain was cluttered. I couldn’t focus on the work I needed to do from home, and I couldn’t quite figure out why. I felt like I was constantly going from task to task, unfocused on everything I was doing.
One day, I decided to watch a random documentary on Netflix called “Minimalism,” to pass time ’til my husband got home. When he came home, he started watching, too. By the end of the documentary, we both decided to overhaul our home and see what minimalism was really about by trying it out.
We got rid of at least three quarters of our closets, everything we didn’t use, and everything that didn’t bring us joy. We even got rid of several of Gemma’s toys, even though it was hard to make those decisions for her. We just realized we had excess, and the excess was what was causing clutter, and the clutter was stealing our joy.
I immediately felt lighter. I was able to have a space to focus on work- an office that was once filled with baby clutter and extra furniture. I could spend the time I usually spent trying to pick up the clutter enjoying time with Gemma.
And this is how I live my days- finding joy in motherhood. Living with less stuff…but everything I need.
Sometimes it was painful to go through and get rid of the excess. I lived with excess for so long that it just felt normal to have so much stuff. But when we got rid of it, we realized how we’d been living, though it might have been our norm, was hurting us- taking away precious time, strangling our creativity, and causing us to lose focus.
We are in the middle of this journey, and I think it will just continuously evolve. But we are simplifying everything, every area of life, one step at a time.
Motherhood should be joyful.
Yes, it is hard. Yes, it breaks you and molds you in ways nothing else can. But it’s beautiful- so why do we so often have a hard time finding beauty in the midst of it. I am just a rookie, really, with only one little babe. But I can say that I know one thing that strangles to joy from motherhood- clutter. Not only a home, but a life gets cluttered more and more with each kid and each activity signed up for and each art project brought home. I don’t know what it is like to have more than one baby, but I do know we are putting things into practice now that will follow us through parenthood.
Simplifying life- not saying yes to everything- and not letting the stuff take over your home, these things can help make motherhood the joyful experience it is meant to be.
I don’t think our kids need the clutter or the excess either- in their possessions or in their schedule. What if we just kept it simple?
That’s what I write about here- simple, joyful motherhood. Living with less stuff and more joy. And keeping the clutter out.